ideas crept

passions we had crept over
when it comes to our interests
and I still miss what it was like sometimes
to feel close to you

while I adjusted some sort of sound equipment
or a structure on a vehicle
or an image on a computer
or words on a page

I think that at this point neither of us will discuss it much
with anyone
there were things I had that were mine
and there were things you had that were yours
and they crept closer and closer
until they met and they merged

into some tangled lump
years old and years past

and I never knew how much effort it would take to sort out

and there is a bike in my basement I should have gotten rid of
you’ve had my furniture for long enough that I know I won’t get it back
and there is a box somewhere buried
that still has things you wrote me in it
still has things you gave me before we hated each other

and I keep track of things so badly that I don’t even know where to find it
and I remember certain things so strongly that I don’t know if I want to
and I remember other things not at all and I worry about the gaps in my memory
and I leave myself so confused

trying to reconcile the ideas of me and of you
trying to remember how we’re not those ideas now

and we were not those ideas then

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